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Wednesday 22 July 2020

skydiving

Characters

Davlyn

Scared of bugs

Likes heights

Havea

Scared of heights

Likes bugs

Railey

Scared of heights

Likes sea


“Come on” Davlyn “for what” said Havea “we are going skydiving” said Davlyn “*snore*” Havea “are you listening to me!!!” Davlyn yelled “wait what” said Havea “oh my gosh” said  Davlyn. “Ok I’ll get up” said Havea “ok I will go get Railey” said Davlyn “RAILEY!! get uppp” said Davlyn “I am” said Railey while getting breakfast. *snore* went Havea “what did I say Havea” said Davlyn “oh sorry” Havea said while getting out of bed and going to go have breakfast.


“So why did we have to get up so early?” said Havea “it is 11:00 am” said Railey “yeah” said Davlyn “oops I guess I slept in” said Havea “and we woke you up because we are going skydiving. “SKYDIVING!!” yelled Railey and Havea “we might fall of” said Havea “yeah, what if we crash our parachutes don’t work and we could be like 100ft in the air” said Railey “It is not that high” said Davlyn “ok” they both replied “hurry up and finished your breakfast I’ll be waiting in the car” said Davlyn


“Beep beep” went the car “hurry up youse two” said Davlyn “coming” they both replied. 

To be continued


8 comments:

  1. i really like how you punctuation next time use detail

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  2. i like your speech marks keep it up.

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  3. GREAT!! dialogue, and good use of Speech mark

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  4. I really liked how you used lots of punctuation

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  5. This is very good it has good detail and is a bit funny but next time can please finished it.

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  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  7. Dialogue, and good use of Speech mark and are writing goal was to yous paragraphs. Good

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  8. Good job Davlyn, I like how you have heaps of detail but next time try to add more detail. you have also your goal of using paragraphs.

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